Postpartum support used to be automatically built into our lives. Now? We have to build our own support system. Not sure where to start? Fear not! I've got you covered!
You know how when you were sick as a kid, your mom (or other caregiver) tucked you in, set up your favorite movie, rubbed your head and brought you a grilled cheese? Well? Believe it or not, THIS is the kind of care you need after having a baby. You have just given birth (equivalent to running about 3 marathons) AND you just finished growing a person (equivalent to a LOT of marathons). You need to rest, recuperate, be nourished, hydrated and generally pampered. But wait? What about the fact that after all those marathons, you actually have to take care of a brand-new little person who is not capable of caring for themselves?
Well, enter your Postpartum Support Team. Or, to have a little fun: Your Fantasy Postpartum Team.
Okay, I have to admit, I am not personally into Fantasy Football but tis the season and it's a brilliant metaphor for building the team that will surround you during your "fourth trimester".
So, let's draft the players:
The Quarterback: You
You're the star after all. You're grown this whole person, and you can lead this family to a "winning" postpartum season. Trust me, you can. You were meant to do this (just not alone). Have you ever seen a quarterback in the middle of a game on the field all by themselves? No? Me either. The quarterback might be the star, but they could NOT pull off a victory without their TEAM. They depend on their teammates to protect them (take care of them) so they can do what they do best. YOU are who your baby needs most. You are the BEST thing for them. Let others take care of you so you can take care of them. Enter:
YOU are who your baby needs most. You are the BEST thing for them. Let others take care of you so you can take care of them.
The Running Back: Your Partner
You trust them the most. You created your pre-game plan together so now is the time to depend on them. While you rest and replenish, snuggle and feed your baby, your partner can help with all the other details. This can look like being in charge of changing diapers, feeding you, filling your water bottle, tidying the house, and blocking (ahem, gatekeeping) visitors. They are here to support you physically and emotionally. They deserve baby snuggles and rest too, of course! I also have never seen a quarterback and a wide receiver alone on the field in the middle of a game. Enter:
The Wide Receiver: Friends and Family
These teammates can use their speed and agility to swoop in and help with meals, errands, household tasks and last-minute baby-holding sessions so you can catch a nap. Friends and family are essential team members. When they have availability, don't be afraid to ask for their help. Trust me, you WILL have your chance to pay it forward later. While friends and family are wonderful, they have their own teams to train and so can't always be there when you need them. Enter:
The Tight End: Postpartum Doula
A postpartum doula is priceless. I wish I'd known about them with my babies. A doula provides essential assistance by anchoring you during this period. They offer guidance, trustworthy information (helping you to avoid the google rabbit hole), education, a listening ear, household assistance, resources, an extra pair of hands and much more. This multi-faceted teammate holds space for you so you can do what you do best - rest and get to know your new baby.
The Defense: Medical Team
Medical pros form a strong line of defense against any issues that may arise. You've probably got your OB/midwife team and pediatrician lined up. But there are many other healthcare professionals who can ease this transition and help you to recover from these immense changes. Enter chiropractors, counselors, massage therapists, lactation professionals, pelvic floor PTs, acupuncturists etc. Have questions about what each of these professionals does? Go back one bullet point to your postpartum doula - who also specializes in translation of postpartum healthcare support.
The Coach: Childbirth and Newborn Educators
These educators, like coaches, guide you with knowledge and prepare you with tools to tackle both childbirth and early parenting. Football coaches educate their players before the season even starts and they continue to coach them throughout. Sign up for an array of childbirth and postpartum classes before baby is born and file the resources the instructors send you for easy reference once the play clock is running.
The Fans: Your New Parent Group
Build your community by joining a new parent group. There is nothing like spending time with other people who are also in the thick of it. Other parents of newborns GET IT like no one else does. Join a support group of people who will cheer you on, support you, listen to you, cry with you, and text with you at 2am. They are loyal and they get you. They provide a sense of community and understanding, and they round out a winning lineup.
Other parents of newborns GET IT like no one else does.
So, there you have it. Your fantasy postpartum team. With this lineup, you've got what it takes to have the best postpartum experience that you can. Will there be some sacks and tough days? Yep. But with a team to fall back on, you'll pick yourself up and head back onto the field with confidence. This is the prime season to accept support from other people. Don't try to do it alone. The perfect team is out there, you just have to draft them.
The perfect team is out there, you just have to draft them.
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Look forward to seeing you soon!
-Hilary
I've got your New Family Needs covered.
